"Behold, You have made my days as handbreadths, and my lifetime as nothing in Your sight; surely every man AT HIS BEST is a mere breath. Selah." Psalm 39:5 (Emphasis mine)
One of my favorite things about God's word is that no matter how many times you read through scripture, it can hit us in different ways and at deeper levels depending on our need in that moment. It is a living word that is there for us, and I love it.
This is what struck me today when reviewing yesterdays sermons in light of our small group study for next week, at his best. Even when I am feeling good and life is at its best, it is still just a breath.
Today, as I was laying down for my nap, I was having attitude issues. My pity party stems back to just this feeling that my life has not been going according to my plan, and therefore I am frequently taking out my frustrations on people who do not deserve it. As I was stewing today, I decided I needed to work on this study. Today we were supposed to meditate on Psalm 39. When I got to this (at his best) it really struck me; if even my best days are a mere breath, how insignificant a time is my bad times?
It makes it easier to relax when I am feeling bad about my day to put into perspective how short the time is compared to the eternity of great time ahead of me.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
A quick blurb on love
God loves you... its easy to brush that off, especially depending on what you believe about God. Its easy for me to just gloss right over it... but that does not make it untrue, or insignificant. It is also easy to brush off in light of what is defined as love anymore. It is easy to look at the cheap, dirty, filth that the world calls love and allow that to taint and diminish the true meaning of the word. Love is not a simple emotion, and it is not propagated by feeling. Love is something much deeper, it is something inherent in our souls. Our core being craves love because that is how we were created. We seek out love in this world because of that inner-longing for what we know we need. It is easy to understand why we are so easily tempted into things that promise us love.
God IS love... To say that we crave love, is to say that we crave God. We were created to bring glory to God, and to be with Him. Due to original sin and the fall of man, we are destined to be separated from God, and thereby, love. We are left with an emptiness and a longing for the thing we know we are missing. We recognize that absence as a need for love. What we forget is that God is love. We have that feeling of need because we need God! Satan has perverted this feeling in us, through sin. We no longer understand love, or God. We get trapped in the worldly version of love, believing that it will complete us. Only God completes us.
I realize that ultimately those two paragraphs say the same thing, and I am totally ok with it. Being someone who has fallen prey to Satan's luring to worldly replacements of love, I thank God that He doesn't give up on us. Never forget that God loves you, and God is love...
God IS love... To say that we crave love, is to say that we crave God. We were created to bring glory to God, and to be with Him. Due to original sin and the fall of man, we are destined to be separated from God, and thereby, love. We are left with an emptiness and a longing for the thing we know we are missing. We recognize that absence as a need for love. What we forget is that God is love. We have that feeling of need because we need God! Satan has perverted this feeling in us, through sin. We no longer understand love, or God. We get trapped in the worldly version of love, believing that it will complete us. Only God completes us.
I realize that ultimately those two paragraphs say the same thing, and I am totally ok with it. Being someone who has fallen prey to Satan's luring to worldly replacements of love, I thank God that He doesn't give up on us. Never forget that God loves you, and God is love...
Monday, August 29, 2011
Something I learned in the bathroom
I don't know about you, but I spend a legitimately large amount of the time in a bathroom. Think about it, even if you only spend a minute or so at a time, you probably spend 15 minutes or more of your day on or near a toilet, plus you really should be in a shower or tub at some point each day as well. Being a night shift nurse, I tend to spend more time awake than the average person, and often take 2 showers a day. I would estimate that I spend a total of an hour a day in the bathroom... as such, I spend alot of time alone with my thoughts. I find I am quite the thinker when I am let to my own devices in the solitude of the loo... so here's something that came to me yesterday...
We often hear analogies regarding parenthood and its symbolizing the relationship between God and mankind. I have always enjoyed the metaphor, and think it often fits really well. I saw it in action yesterday. My daughter is just over a year old and is very much a daddy's girl. (I am totally ok with this) She wants to spend time close to me, and often gets upset when she can't. This was exacerbated yesterday when I needed to take a shower. She followed me around the house, called my name and wanted me to hold her. She became increasingly upset as I was unable to pick her up. I had just finished mowing and was covered in dirt and sweat. The displeased little lady hit her breaking point when I went into the bedroom and closed the door, effectively breaking her little heart. As I got into the shower, I could hear her cries and her calling out "Dada, Dada!"... then she got quiet. I finished my shower and hoped that she was doing ok, put on some clothes and went back into the bedroom. She was sitting on the bed with her mama, playing and waiting for me to join them.
See the parallel?
We, especially as new Christians, want to be close to our daddy. We desire to follow Him, and to love Him. We love to feel close to His heart and be held in His arms. There are times in our walk that we feel like we can't get close to God, times when we feel like we are running in circles and that God is just ignoring us. We find it hard to understand that for whatever reason in that moment, it is for our own good that God pulls Himself back. It is not easy for Him to sit back and watch or listen to His children cry out, but sometimes it is necessary. So, how do we respond in those moments? Do we run away from God? Do we decide that He has abandoned us? Do we do it on our own? Or do we do what God's word tells us to do? Do we have child-like faith?
Maybe what we need most in that time is to go to someone who has a deeper understanding and knowledge of God. We need mentors who can help us get through those times. We should surround ourselves with people who are smarter than us, and can encourage us. Through guidance and prayer, they can help us get through the times we feel God is distant.
Thats what my little girl taught me yesterday. When she felt that I was far away, she called out for me, and went to find help from someone who knows me better than she does. She knew that her mama could help her. Together they waited and continued to call out for me... and I was all too happy to rejoin them
We often hear analogies regarding parenthood and its symbolizing the relationship between God and mankind. I have always enjoyed the metaphor, and think it often fits really well. I saw it in action yesterday. My daughter is just over a year old and is very much a daddy's girl. (I am totally ok with this) She wants to spend time close to me, and often gets upset when she can't. This was exacerbated yesterday when I needed to take a shower. She followed me around the house, called my name and wanted me to hold her. She became increasingly upset as I was unable to pick her up. I had just finished mowing and was covered in dirt and sweat. The displeased little lady hit her breaking point when I went into the bedroom and closed the door, effectively breaking her little heart. As I got into the shower, I could hear her cries and her calling out "Dada, Dada!"... then she got quiet. I finished my shower and hoped that she was doing ok, put on some clothes and went back into the bedroom. She was sitting on the bed with her mama, playing and waiting for me to join them.
See the parallel?
We, especially as new Christians, want to be close to our daddy. We desire to follow Him, and to love Him. We love to feel close to His heart and be held in His arms. There are times in our walk that we feel like we can't get close to God, times when we feel like we are running in circles and that God is just ignoring us. We find it hard to understand that for whatever reason in that moment, it is for our own good that God pulls Himself back. It is not easy for Him to sit back and watch or listen to His children cry out, but sometimes it is necessary. So, how do we respond in those moments? Do we run away from God? Do we decide that He has abandoned us? Do we do it on our own? Or do we do what God's word tells us to do? Do we have child-like faith?
Maybe what we need most in that time is to go to someone who has a deeper understanding and knowledge of God. We need mentors who can help us get through those times. We should surround ourselves with people who are smarter than us, and can encourage us. Through guidance and prayer, they can help us get through the times we feel God is distant.
Thats what my little girl taught me yesterday. When she felt that I was far away, she called out for me, and went to find help from someone who knows me better than she does. She knew that her mama could help her. Together they waited and continued to call out for me... and I was all too happy to rejoin them
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
God knows me
During worship Sunday morning at FBC-Nixa (check us out sometime) I was struck in a rather unexpected way when Steve mentioned Lamentations 3:40. I was reminded that not only is God never surprised by the happenings of this world, but also He is never surprised by my own life. Furthermore, it is almost as though God expects me to fail. Read through this verse:
"Let us search out our ways,and turn back to God." Lamentations 3:40
God does not require me to be perfect in my following of Him, He knows I can't do it. He knows that within my innermost being there is a sense of individualism. God made me, and He knows that there are times that I am going to doubt everything, down to the very core of His existence. I've hit that place so many times in my past, both distant and recent. So often I hear that voice in my head laughing at me for believing that anything so ridiculous as a personable and loving God could exist. My own ego mocks that even if this God could exist, that He would send Himself in the form of a baby, and that this child would grow into a man, living a perfect life, to die and take the punishment that I deserve. My inner monolouge tells me I am stupid for thinking any of this is truth... Then I am reminded of the times I bought into those doubts. The lonely days of sitting in a dorm room, unable to get out of bed. The feelings of total abandonment of all things happy and good that preceeded not just one, but two academic suspensions. (not to mention an 80pound weight gain, and loss of many good friends)I remember the night that I finally reopened my Bible... and read "Let us search out our ways, and turn back to God"
I needed to hear those words again... God knows I will get comfortable and complacent and start trying to seek my own ways again.
Thank you God for never giving up on me
"Let us search out our ways,and turn back to God." Lamentations 3:40
God does not require me to be perfect in my following of Him, He knows I can't do it. He knows that within my innermost being there is a sense of individualism. God made me, and He knows that there are times that I am going to doubt everything, down to the very core of His existence. I've hit that place so many times in my past, both distant and recent. So often I hear that voice in my head laughing at me for believing that anything so ridiculous as a personable and loving God could exist. My own ego mocks that even if this God could exist, that He would send Himself in the form of a baby, and that this child would grow into a man, living a perfect life, to die and take the punishment that I deserve. My inner monolouge tells me I am stupid for thinking any of this is truth... Then I am reminded of the times I bought into those doubts. The lonely days of sitting in a dorm room, unable to get out of bed. The feelings of total abandonment of all things happy and good that preceeded not just one, but two academic suspensions. (not to mention an 80pound weight gain, and loss of many good friends)I remember the night that I finally reopened my Bible... and read "Let us search out our ways, and turn back to God"
I needed to hear those words again... God knows I will get comfortable and complacent and start trying to seek my own ways again.
Thank you God for never giving up on me
Monday, July 4, 2011
Reboot
When I write, I often wonder who will read my words, and how it will inspire them. Since I am such an influential person, and tens of well... tens of people have read this blog, I envision that I must be really important. I received a bit of a gut check earlier today, and figure I may as well write about it... who knows, maybe it'll help someone.
My wife and I have been struggling in our pursuit of Debt Freedom, ala Dave Ramsey. The last month in particular was crazy because of mom and her choosing to go on Hospice and then expiring little over a week later... but really for several months now we have been all over the map with our money. Then, yesterday, in Sunday School, I was praying with a friend who is also trying to follow Dave's plan. I uttered something to the effect of feeling like I am just sitting here waiting for God to do something to accelerate this process. I managed to shift the blame! When I later recounted this to my wife, she commented that, with the way we've been financially living, there isn't much of anything for God to accelerate.
That idea stung me enough as it was, but I followed it by re-reading some of my earlier posts and came across one about waiting on God. In this post, I railed against people who sit around and wait for God to do something, instead of joining God in what He is already doing around them. Never thought those words were going to be meant for me.
Then I bumped into a very recent post regarding feeling like God was telling me to get back to the things He called me to get to work on in my own life... weight loss, and debt freedom. This ran head-long into a conversation I had recently in which I told my wife that I felt like my mom was nearing her death, and that God had been laying on me that I needed to get our finances and my health in line... I just feel like there is so much that is in store for us that we need to be completely prepared for it and that I needed to lose some of the excuses I would use.
Took me back to 3 things:
1) I am to be in a state of Missional Living, being always ready (physically, financially, emotionally) for whatever service God calls me to
2) I am to set the example of this lifestyle in my home
3) The only thing stopping me is myself
With that said, we are embarking on new weight-loss strategy (starts tomorrow), and getting back to business with Dave Ramsey! After receiving the news of an anonymous donor clearing our Church of debt, I am reminded anew why I was so stirred by Dave's words in the first place. It also reminded me that God is going to use our church for bigger and better things, and I am to be a part of it... so I gotta get crackin'... time to reboot and do it right
Pray for me and my family as we recommit to these goals in our lives so we may better serve Christ, and lessen our excuses.
My wife and I have been struggling in our pursuit of Debt Freedom, ala Dave Ramsey. The last month in particular was crazy because of mom and her choosing to go on Hospice and then expiring little over a week later... but really for several months now we have been all over the map with our money. Then, yesterday, in Sunday School, I was praying with a friend who is also trying to follow Dave's plan. I uttered something to the effect of feeling like I am just sitting here waiting for God to do something to accelerate this process. I managed to shift the blame! When I later recounted this to my wife, she commented that, with the way we've been financially living, there isn't much of anything for God to accelerate.
That idea stung me enough as it was, but I followed it by re-reading some of my earlier posts and came across one about waiting on God. In this post, I railed against people who sit around and wait for God to do something, instead of joining God in what He is already doing around them. Never thought those words were going to be meant for me.
Then I bumped into a very recent post regarding feeling like God was telling me to get back to the things He called me to get to work on in my own life... weight loss, and debt freedom. This ran head-long into a conversation I had recently in which I told my wife that I felt like my mom was nearing her death, and that God had been laying on me that I needed to get our finances and my health in line... I just feel like there is so much that is in store for us that we need to be completely prepared for it and that I needed to lose some of the excuses I would use.
Took me back to 3 things:
1) I am to be in a state of Missional Living, being always ready (physically, financially, emotionally) for whatever service God calls me to
2) I am to set the example of this lifestyle in my home
3) The only thing stopping me is myself
With that said, we are embarking on new weight-loss strategy (starts tomorrow), and getting back to business with Dave Ramsey! After receiving the news of an anonymous donor clearing our Church of debt, I am reminded anew why I was so stirred by Dave's words in the first place. It also reminded me that God is going to use our church for bigger and better things, and I am to be a part of it... so I gotta get crackin'... time to reboot and do it right
Pray for me and my family as we recommit to these goals in our lives so we may better serve Christ, and lessen our excuses.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
God's perfect timing
Shortly after my mother departed this life yesterday afternoon, Z looked at me and told me to look at the date... June 25th.
June 25th, 2011
Had our daughter been carried anywhere near to term, her first birthday party would have been yesterday. June 25th was her original due date, and the fact that it fell on a Saturday would have made that day the day for the party had she been born anytime within a week or so of that date. But God, in His perfect timing and in His perfect knowing, did not allow that to happen. My little lady was born nearly a month early. The days that followed her birth were the most frightened and stressed out days of my life. Her stay in the Intensive Care Nursery was nearly unbearable. At the time, I struggled with understanding why it was that God was putting me through such a time. I know why now...
Because God loves us, and because He alone knows what each day will hold, my mom was able to see her granddaughter turn 1. She was able to give us an awesome memory, and a tribute to her strength and love of family. Mom, with the assistance of Dad, and her doctor (and unknown by the nursing staff) left the hospital to be at this birthday party. They said they just felt strongly that she needed to be there. She got to hold this youngest grandchild on her first birthday, and watch her eat cake. It would not have been this way, without the pain and fear of an early birthday.
None of this was coincidence, or happenstance... it was God's perfect timing
I hope that today, as we head to churches, or golf courses, or lakes, or whatever it is that you do... you'll think twice about the love God has for you, and the importance of Christ in your life.
June 25th, 2011
Had our daughter been carried anywhere near to term, her first birthday party would have been yesterday. June 25th was her original due date, and the fact that it fell on a Saturday would have made that day the day for the party had she been born anytime within a week or so of that date. But God, in His perfect timing and in His perfect knowing, did not allow that to happen. My little lady was born nearly a month early. The days that followed her birth were the most frightened and stressed out days of my life. Her stay in the Intensive Care Nursery was nearly unbearable. At the time, I struggled with understanding why it was that God was putting me through such a time. I know why now...
Because God loves us, and because He alone knows what each day will hold, my mom was able to see her granddaughter turn 1. She was able to give us an awesome memory, and a tribute to her strength and love of family. Mom, with the assistance of Dad, and her doctor (and unknown by the nursing staff) left the hospital to be at this birthday party. They said they just felt strongly that she needed to be there. She got to hold this youngest grandchild on her first birthday, and watch her eat cake. It would not have been this way, without the pain and fear of an early birthday.
None of this was coincidence, or happenstance... it was God's perfect timing
I hope that today, as we head to churches, or golf courses, or lakes, or whatever it is that you do... you'll think twice about the love God has for you, and the importance of Christ in your life.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Sunday morning convictions- June 12th
Alot of us do not care for conviction, it hurts, and forces us to rethink the ways we do things... and it may even make us change! This past week has involved several nudges and kicks that culminated this morning with a couple of convictions that I needed to address.
There are a couple of pursuits in my life that I started 6-8 months ago, and have not been progressing the way they should be. I have been feeling for the last week that I need to retool and step back up to the plate. The first of these involves our personal finances. Z and I started the Total Money Makeover last September, and we have done well. However, the last few months, we have become much more laid back and have lost our intensity. We started because we knew that we were not treating our money the way God calls us to do so... but we became complacent and lazy. We need to step it back up, and get back on the wagon!
The second endeavor, weight loss. I know that it seems strange to feel God calling us to lose weight, but I really do feel that way. Why? Because I believe that as part of our call to be living missional lives, and remain in a state of readiness to carry out what God calls us to do, we must be in a physical state of health that allows us to complete the mission we are called to. It boils down (for me) to the fact that I know myself well enough to know that sooner or later I will tell God, "God, I wish I could join you in this mission to do/help _______, but I just physically can't" I feel that it is important for me to get myself into shape, in order to erase that potential excuse.
These are two things in my life that I know I started because they are in line with what God wants for me in this life. I wish I could say that I started them, and followed through with fervent obedience. I wish this post was to share the awesome progression that has been made to reach these goals. Here's to rejoining God in the work He is doing in my life, and I hope that we can all do the same... here's to obedience, and keeping Christ as our priority.
There are a couple of pursuits in my life that I started 6-8 months ago, and have not been progressing the way they should be. I have been feeling for the last week that I need to retool and step back up to the plate. The first of these involves our personal finances. Z and I started the Total Money Makeover last September, and we have done well. However, the last few months, we have become much more laid back and have lost our intensity. We started because we knew that we were not treating our money the way God calls us to do so... but we became complacent and lazy. We need to step it back up, and get back on the wagon!
The second endeavor, weight loss. I know that it seems strange to feel God calling us to lose weight, but I really do feel that way. Why? Because I believe that as part of our call to be living missional lives, and remain in a state of readiness to carry out what God calls us to do, we must be in a physical state of health that allows us to complete the mission we are called to. It boils down (for me) to the fact that I know myself well enough to know that sooner or later I will tell God, "God, I wish I could join you in this mission to do/help _______, but I just physically can't" I feel that it is important for me to get myself into shape, in order to erase that potential excuse.
These are two things in my life that I know I started because they are in line with what God wants for me in this life. I wish I could say that I started them, and followed through with fervent obedience. I wish this post was to share the awesome progression that has been made to reach these goals. Here's to rejoining God in the work He is doing in my life, and I hope that we can all do the same... here's to obedience, and keeping Christ as our priority.
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